Sunday, September 23, 2012

Blah...

I have a major case of the blahs.

I might not be one of those people who is always exuding sunshine and rainbows (I sort of hate those people anyway), but I am a content person.
I am happy with what I have.
I don't define my happiness or success by having an exciting, high-paying job or designer clothes. I don't drive a fancy, expensive car and have absolutely no desire to.
I have my health (minus the damn 'betes) and my family. I have a great husband, two healthy kids, a roof over my head, and food (mostly cookies) in my belly. Life is good.

But that doesn't stop me from feeling really, just.... bleh...

I love our girls, but man-oh-man have they been driving me insane. Just completely bonkers. For the past 8 days I have heard more crying and whining than I think I have heard in the entire past year. Between both of them having horrible colds and Avery cutting the world's slowest moving molars, it's been all I can do to keep a small grasp on my sanity.
[I always know my feelings are justified when Jared of all people is peacing out for work early.]
That means it's bad.

I have found myself getting irrationally mad at Bailey for the dumbest things, like when she insisted on starting to count from 3 instead of 1 one day. I am sure she was doing it to get a reaction and the sad part is that it was working. It also isn't helping that she has officially decided to disagree with me on every single part of the day.

Typical morning:
     Me: Bailey, do you want cereal or yogurt for breakfast?
     Bailey: I want yogurt. Yogurt! Yogurt!
     Me: (give her yogurt)
     Bailey: No! No yogurt! I want cereal.
**Now apply this scenario to every single part of every day. Clothes, using the potty, brushing teeth, nap time, what book to read. The possibilities are simply endless.

It has to be hormones, right?
When in doubt, blame it on the hormones...
I don't remember ever having such a profound loss of patience about anything and everything. I could seriously fly off the handle at any given moment. And thank God for texting because it has probably saved me from going all-out super-bitch on someone at work a couple of times at least.
And, in general, some people are just so damn obnoxious. And annoying. It shouldn't bother me, but it does. I just want to roll my eyes. Constantly. And so I send a snarky text message to help put myself in check. {Apparently my maturity also made an exit along with my patience.}

I have just felt in a funk this past weekend. Saturday afternoon was all free and clear for me to do anything I wanted. The house was spic and span, the girls were taking an amazingly long nap, and Jared went to nap too. I had time to myself. But I just didn't want to do anything. I tried to read, watch a movie, take a nap, journal... nothing was doing it for me. I hate that feeling.

I apologize for this entire post.
It's kind of become an online vent session for me. But I feel a little better.
If I didn't have a bun in the oven right now, I would resort to a large, large Long Island Iced Tea and an iTunes mix of get-out-the-anger type songs (Beaner always has the best mixes of these) to make myself feel better. And it would probably work. But alas...*sigh*

Hopefully some of you fellow preggos and former pregnant ladies (and anyone who just likes a good bitch sesh in general) can relate. Sometimes you just have to let it out. And as much as I love being pregnant, I am ready to have my more even-keeled self back. [This is where Jared laughs to himself.]

Just looking at the pictures Jared took today made me feel horrible. I looked just plain fat in 90% of them and forbid him to post them anywhere. There is a reason I don't take pictures while pregnant - apart from the periodic side-bump shots. And apparently horizontal stripes are not your friend when it comes to maternity wear. Lesson learned. It sucks to have to learn it through photographic evidence though.

But there were some cute shots so I will post some of those. Jared bought himself a new camera lens with his gambling winnings from almost a year ago, so we went out to mess around and take a few pics with the girls.



 

 
 


Aren't they just too precious for words?
 

Moments like those remind me of how much I love them - snotty noses and all. Being a mom is really hard work. Much harder some days than others. But the sweet moments make all the other crap worth it.
 
And with this long-winded post, I believe I have talked myself out of my blahs.
Thanks for sticking it out with me.

3 comments:

  1. Sometimes I get the blahs as well. Hang in there!

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  2. Yep! Something was definitley in the water yesterday :s I blame A LOT on my hormones too haha! In your case, you really do have an excuse! Please don't say you look fat. When I came to the picture of just you on the bridge I literally said "wow, she is so beautiful!!" I think that shirt looks spectacular on you and truly, you RADIATE and ooze beauty ... don't think for a second you don't! Your girls look insanely cute in these pics. I need Jared to take some of Jocie and I!!! :)

    Glad you and I are on the journey of motherhood together!!! Love you!

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    Replies
    1. Well thanks for the reassuring words, Angie. But honestly, you didn't see the other 90%! Not good! I threatened Jared with bodily harm if he even thought about posting them.

      Jared is always up for impromptu photo practicing sessions. You just roadtrip it up here, sister, and we will hook you up! Jocelyn does seem to like the camera. :)

      Hope you are having a better day today. ♥

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