real, real quick

I'm sneaking in a few minutes to write a little something.

Christmas was great. 

I have non-phone, camera-quality pictures to prove it that are for now sitting on our "my book" file thingy attached to the computer (my computer knowledge is clearly vast and limitless) but have not been edited since I'm dependent on Jared to download the program I know how to use. When it comes to technology, I really hate learning new things. If my old way still works and isn't obsolete, let me keep using it! The death of our computer really threw off my photo organization mojo. 

We're currently all sick. We survived the month of December and most of January sickness free - not counting way too many lab tests and trips to Omaha - but we finally all caught something. We've all been battling sore throats for a week and I finally broke down on Wednesday and got all three kids on antibiotics. Turns out they had ear infections too. 

Jared and I are soldiering on. Mostly because I can't force myself to drag all the kids with me to the doctor's office again. My aching head can't handle that mess.

Life is continuing normally. 

We have swimming lessons every Saturday for 6 weeks. Bailey is in Level 2 without her siblings and loves it. Graham also enjoys them, in fact he is the first one out of almost 20 kids to jump in the pool. Avery... I'm so shocked (*not at all*) that she doesn't want a new person to have anything to do with her. We're halfway through and she just last week let someone assist her without screaming. I have high hopes (which will most likely die a quick death) that tomorrow will be drama-free.

School is school. I never hear any complaints, and we only hear minimal information. Already we have to pry one word answers out of them as to what they did or how their day was. 

I love seeing the progression of a kindergartner's writing. 
It is really like a brain teaser to figure out the phonetic spelling that makes up a 5 year-old's writing. 

I personally love that her snowman is having hot "koko" because I grew up in a cocoa-lovin' family. 

Cocoa and peanut butter sandwiches for the win!

Jared and I also get a huge kick out of the drawings her and her friends exchange and send home.

Bailey and Darius were friends in preschool last year, and he is in her section this year as well. We receive weekly drawings from Darius, and apparently the feelings are mutual because Darius's dad reports he gets the same things we do. Ahh, young love.  ;)

Avery loves school too, and I find it amusing how she tries to keep up with her big sis. She gets upset that she isn't learning about the solar system like Bailey, and she wants to be able to read words like yesterday. So we've been working on sounding out simple 3 letters words, and the easel my parent's bought them for Christmas is pretty handy when it comes to practicing those skills. And for drawing rainbows over and over. Obviously.

Graham seems to be stable right now. His itching comes and goes along with the rash. But as of his last labs 7 days ago, his liver enzymes have almost returned to normal. We have an appointment with an allergist to cover some more bases, and we're using some new skin products to try and cut down on what might be some eczema related itching. He doesn't have a return appointment to his GI specialist until March, so hopefully all stays well until then.

This month I've started back on the C25k program now that we have a treadmill. We bought a nice used one from a friend of my sister Felicia and I have used it in some capacity nearly every day. (If I am going to be watching a TV show alone after the kids are in bed, I might as well walk and burn some calories while doing it. Right now it's The Good Wife season 3.) I found myself way out of running shape since I hadn't run at all since early October, but it is steadily coming back to me. 

The upcoming month promises to be busy: swimming lessons continue, our Broncos play in Super Bowl 50, Jared's mom comes for a week-long visit, Bailey turns 6 (eek! How did that happen!), a yearly Omaha cleft team visit, a pedicure date with a friend, Bible study resumes... All good things. 

But my sneaky few minutes are up. Kids are demanding lunch and my own stomach is growling. Happy weekend, friends!

Memorial Weekend and my first 5k

Memorial Day weekend has always included a local town's yearly celebration. I grew up attending elementary school and middle school in Lytton, so Gala Days was something we always did. The town has grown smaller, the school was shut down as schools consolidated, but there is always Gala Days every May.

Back when I was younger, the carnival with its various rides and games was a huge highlight. It kicked off summer. We participated in all the kiddie games, competing in categories like the three-legged race and the egg toss, to win tickets.

Thinking back on all that triggered an impromptu trip down memory lane. So bear with me as I review old photos from the mid-80's. If nothing else I know my grandma Connie is gonna get a kick out of them - she's a very loyal reader and all. :)

The carousel, a summer fair staple
There hasn't been one at Gala Days in many, many years simply because it is too expensive. In fact, our kids have never ridden on one. We might have to change that. Summer Bucket List perhaps?

Awww... it's toddler Vanessa.

And then another sister gets added and suddenly you have a constant car companion.
This scene was repeated frequently throughout high school as I drug Fe along everywhere with me.

Apparently the cars are a hit no matter what the decade because our kids were pretty pumped about them too. Of course they had to make sure their friends could ride along too. And in case you are having a case of deja vu, you'd be correct since this is almost the exact scene from last year's Gala Days. Graham tried to climb in with the girls but was promptly booted from the car. He recovered quickly and found his own ride.

We enjoyed the yearly parade too. Bailey and Graham rode on a horse-drawn trolley and threw candy with friends while Avery stayed back to collect all the candy. Later we got some homemade pie and watched Graham dominate the bike race. Watch out - he has officially mastered the strider!

Saturday morning was a big deal for me. 
I've been training for a 5k for the past 8 weeks or so. It was kind of a random thing. I started running after I broke my hand and couldn't lift weight anymore. I used the Couch-to-5k app on my phone and it was really helpful. Before Saturday I had only run a complete 3.1 miles one other time. 

My sister Justy has been occasionally running for the past few years and ran long distance in high school, so I recruited her to come along with me. 

There were about 80 or so runners in this particular race. I felt ridiculously nervous, especially considering how extremely casual this race really was. I knew I wouldn't have a problem finishing, but the nerves were there regardless. The weather was perfect for a race; we couldn't have asked for a nicer running day.

Our pace was a bit ridiculous at first. We simply joined the pack and started churning away. The clear leader of the race was a high school classmate of mine who ran in the Boston Marathon this year. Simply put he was quite a bit more advanced than everyone else there... At 3/4 of a mile my running app announced that we were running at a 8:45 mile pace - waaay faster than I ever run. (I usually maintain a 10-11 minute mile for the entire run.) We dropped down the speed a bit for the rest of it. On the last mile I told Justy to go on ahead because I could tell she was picking up speed as I was losing it, so she embraced her kick and finished ahead of me.

My running app messed up and kept the clock running after I crossed the finish line, and the race coordinators didn't write down exact times for every person (I told you it was casual) so I am figuring my time was 32 minutes based on the splits from my RunKeeper app. I was really surprised with that time. My goal was to finish, but I also was hoping to run it in under 35 minutes. I achieved both of those and felt a nice sense of accomplishment once I was done.

DONE!

I will probably run another 5k again. Next time I will be more cognizant of establishing my own pace. But I also know that is easier said than done. It feels like human nature to try to keep up with the person ahead of you. The other runners obviously push you to up the pace which in turn can make your time faster and make you a better runner. So it's both good and bad.

As far as my next goal(s), I think I will work on increasing speed, sticking to 1 mile or 2 mile distances. I much prefer to run 2 miles over a longer distance. Hopefully as I work on that, 3 miles will become easier. I'm also trying to get back into doing some short HIIT videos at home again. Taking two months off from that has me feeling back at zero when it comes to weights. Hopefully it comes back quickly.

On Sunday we spent the day at my parents'. My dad was bursting with excitement to show the kids the surprise he had in store for them. I wish I had taken video of the "big reveal" because they were so pumped. 

Now they have their very own Ranger just like Papa Jeff. Watching both girls learn how to operate it (and almost run down Graham many, many times) led to an afternoon of laughing until we cried. I'm positive this is going to be a favorite for a long time to come.

one year on MyFitnessPal

Today marks one total year using the MyFitnessPal app - logging food and exercise every day.

Or almost every day.

I took a week off from food logging while we vacationed in Colorado and when Jared and I went to Mexico last month. I also took off a handful of other days when it would have been almost impossible to correctly log my food - the 4th of July, a couple of birthday parties, etc. But I still checked in and logged exercise even if I wasn't logging food entries. 

Personally, I love MyFitnessPal (MFP). I tried a few other times in the past to lose weight - usually just working out more often, but I never incorporated actual calorie counting. I think that is why MFP has worked so well for me. Anyone who knows me - or knows Jared or my sisters or my freaking entire family - knows that I love to eat. 

That whole "Don't live to eat, eat to live" thing... 

Uhhh... yeah, not a firm believer in the truth to that yet...

The biggest piece of knowledge I have gained over the past year is portion size. I know it sounds simple, but it was eye-opening. I was consuming double what I thought I was. It took a good two or three weeks of logging and eating normal portions for my stomach to adjust. So basically for a couple weeks I thought I was starving - because I was finally eating a normal amount of food. But after that initial adjustment, it hasn't been that hard.

Do I sometimes eat double portions? 

Hell yes. 

But it's because I am making the choice to, not because I don't know any better and am deluding myself. 

MyFitnessPal is great for the fact that I eat what I want and see how it fits into my day so I can still meet my goals. I never went into this believing I would only eat "clean" foods. I wanted to find a balance so I could be healthier and still enjoy the foods I like. And I have achieved that. If I want pizza I better work out so I can "afford" the calories. It's about balance and learning a way to live after all the pounds are shed.

And speaking of -

so far I have lost 32.5 pounds. 

The first 30 came off in the first 7 months.

Face-to-Face:  One year difference

Since Christmas time I have had to shift my focus from weight loss to other fitness goals. After a while the scale stops changing as quickly as before, and it became important to find other things to work on. I've switched up my workout routine a few times, and believe me, I am grateful that spring arrived so I could get a break from the workout videos!

The weight loss has been great, but I try to focus on the other things that I've accomplished or am working toward.

Non-scale victories if you will.

* I lost 3 pant sizes

I went from a size 16 (ugh, I hate to even type that out...) to a size 9/10 in jeans. And those 9/10's are even getting a bit loose now. I also now wear medium-sized shirts.

* Smaller ring size. 

I had to resize my wedding ring down 1 1/2 sizes because it was literally sliding off my finger multiple times a day.

* Increased confidence

Let's get real here, I avoided the bathroom mirror frequently. And if I were to catch a glimpse when I was getting in the shower? Terrible. I don't feel that way anymore. I've worked hard. And while I still have more work to do, I am proud of the changes. 

* A better role model

Kids are little sponges. And as much as you can tell them to do something, they seem to learn by example best. Our kids eat more nutritiously because we are eating more nutritiously. They are more active because we're more active. They see mom putting in the effort to take care of her health, and that is a message I think is important to send to our kids.

* Improved health
So other than all the benefits we all already know of, I was surprised by one. I went to the doctor for my recent hand probs and was stunned to learn my pulse (which for my whole adult life has been in the mid-80s) was 58 bpm at two separate appointments. Clearly all this exercise is not only helping my waistline, but also strengthening my heart.

* Better sleep

This one has been a bit less obvious, but before I started working out, I would go to bed exhausted and fall asleep for a half-hour or so and then startle awake. And I couldn't go back to sleep. I don't have that problem anymore. (Now if I can just convince my kids that sleep is something we shouldn't fight...)

* Challenging myself

Lastly, I'm proud that I've stepped out of my comfort zone. Not only in just starting to use MFP or exercising in general, but that I have looked at something, thought it was hard, and decided to try anyway. Whether it was a 50 minute HASfit video that looked difficult or starting running, I've tackled some things that a year ago I wouldn't have dreamed I'd be doing.

I've learned a lot in a year.

I've learned you have to want it badly enough to put in the work. 

If it were easy, everybody would be running marathons and rocking their 6-pack abs around town. It didn't work before because I didn't put in the work. As simple as that.

I've learned that it is about me. 
I'm doing this for me. There are times when other people don't notice changes or encourage and support you like you wish they would, but you're not doing it for them - you're doing it for you. Keep on doing what works for you.

I've learned to be flexible. 
As in all areas of life, rigidity can make things a lot harder. I prefer to work out in the late morning or early afternoon. But that doesn't always jive with a husband that works night shift, so I've had to adapt. I was in the groove doing my cardio-plus-weights videos and then I broke my hand. Had to adapt. Sometimes what was working before stops producing results and you have to shake things up. Being flexible just makes the whole process easier.

I've learned how important goals are. 

At first the goal is usually losing weight, but when that's accomplished - now what? I've set new goals for working out and most recently a goal to run a 5k this spring/summer. That's something I never thought I would do. It really is amazing what you are capable of when you put your mind to it.

new focus and goals

This week marked one year of exercising. And not just here and there exercising - consistently exercising 5 days a week. I added in MyFitnessPal at the end of the month, so my 365 day streak on that site is quickly approaching. Annnnnd I'm a nerd, so I'm excited about that. 

I thought today I would take a quick look back at how far I've come - not something I usually do visually. It's one thing to weigh yourself and know those numbers, it's a whole other ball game to see a picture side-by-side.

The "before" photo is from November 2013. Not the start of my journey (I feel corny even saying the word "journey" but I can't think of a better replacement) but basically the same as my start weight last April. The "after" is a photo I snapped in Mexico a couple of weeks ago. And in case you're wondering about the round circle on my stomach - it's the site for my insulin pump. #diabetesprobs

Recently (and for the past couple of months) the scale hasn't budged much. I've noticed my jeans and some shirts are a little looser, so I'm not complaining too loudly. I would like to ideally lose another 8 pounds to reach my goal of a healthy BMI, but it isn't the end of the world if it doesn't happen. I've gotten less rigid in my definition of success. Success isn't just a number on a scale, it's how good you feel. And it's taken a long, lonnnng while to realize it, but I feel good where I am at right now.

Since coming back from vacation, I broke my hand. As expected, it's made things challenging. As many of you know I love my HASfit videos and was nearly finished with the 90 Day Warrior Program. I had 7 days left, but right now I can't complete the last week since I can't lift any weight. It sucks to come 12 weeks into something and get stopped on the homestretch.

But honestly... I was getting a little stir-crazy anyway. These Iowa winters leave everybody trapped indoors and I am pretty sick of exercise videos. With the weather getting nicer, I've been reevaluating what I want to do and achieve. A big thanks to my deadbeat hand for expediting that process!

I decided to finally use the Couch-to-5k (C25k) app on my phone. And I downloaded a running app to track my route and pace. Right now I am still in the phases of interval running, so the following route is actually 19 minutes of running (approx 10:30min/mile pace) and 18 minutes of walking. 

I don't know how accurate it all is, but it's nice to have another tool in the tool belt for evaluating progress. Plus having no access to a treadmill, I had zero idea what pace I was running at, which is a helpful piece of info when logging exercise in MFP. My route looks a little crazy because I am still figuring it all out. Plus I backtracked a wee bit when I realized I forgot to pee before leaving the house and had to duck into the public library quickly. I ended my workout doing some extra running around our block. 

I don't know how the rest of this 5k training is going to go. I hadn't really ever thought of running one before; this is just a new way to challenge myself. I've never been much of a runner (unless running sprints in high school track counts - Spoiler Alert: it really doesn't). Right now I am fine with the intervals. It's the 20 minutes straight next week that scares me. But I will cross that bridge when I get to it. Just like I have everything else.

For any runners out there, I appreciate any and all tips you can offer.
Over the last week I have come to appreciate the necessity of stretching. Yikes!

February this and that

The book nerd in me is coming out a bit again lately. 

I've always loved to read, but sometimes after I finish a book, I get in this weird slump where I am lazy and don't want to start another one. But the good news is that our local library (which is awesome, by the way) has about 15 of the 30-ish books in my current to-read list on Goodreads, so I have zero excuse to not be reading.

I most recently finished Yes Please by Amy Poehler. 

I'd heard a lot of rave reviews about it. Lots of "empowering to women" comments, that kind of thing. Jared downloaded it to his tablet and read it thinking it would be funny. He's always thought Amy Poehler was hilarious. So when he told me he didn't like it, I was thinking maybe it was too much "girl power!" or she referenced her monthly flow a couple times or something. So I picked it up at the library and read it anyway.

The following sentence sums up my feelings:

Meh.

That's my official book review. 

It wasn't really funny. 

Yes, I laughed a few times because I think the woman could rewrite the dictionary and still make it funny, but it wasn't a funny book. There were too many parts that I was like, "Yep, don't care." "Yep, still don't care." *skimming. skimming. skimming*

A whole chapter on her drug use. 

As someone who has never done a single illegal drug, this was interesting for a few pages, but it started to give that feeling you get when you're stuck talking to a 19 year-old, and all they can talk about is how awesome some party was last weekend. And how many people were there. And oh man, how drunk everyone was. 

And you're standing there, glazing over, trying to pretend to give a shit. 

And it seems like no one is ever going to come save you from this tedious conversation. 

That was my feeling during parts of the book. 

So in total, I don't recommend. 

Also, it's a memoir, so please write something we can't learn from reading your Wikipedia entry.

This past Sunday was the Super Bowl. Despite the fact that I have always despised the Patriots and don't give a flip about the Seahawks either, we watched. We always watch. As a football fan, it's what you do.

Oh, that and we always eat snacks.

Our kids thought it was the coolest thing ever that they didn't have to eat at the dining room table. 

A table? 

Filled with snacks?

In the living room?

While we watch TV?!

It was apparently special in the world of toddlers and preschoolers. 

It was a great game, even though I did lose the family pool to Justy.

Let's see. What else is new? 

What else... what else...

Oh, I've been obsessively reading reviews for our vacation to Puerto Vallarta in March. I am jotting down notes of people's tips on restaurants and tours and how to go bars at night without risking our safety. I realize this might be borderline obsessive, but since we haven't gone on vacation in forever, I want to make this the best vacation possible. 

Also, I bought a bathing suit.

Annnnnd it has two pieces. Eek! 

I feel okay about it. 

Wait, can black still be slimming even if your stomach is showing???

And speaking of my stomach, I am only showing you this photo because I am proud of where I've come in the last few months. And I know I posted it on instagram, but since I have like 12 followers on there, I am posting here too. Deal with it. 

Those are my shorts from this past summer, I was still wearing them in August. I can't even keep them up at this point - they slide straight down. I'm excited to need to buy a new pair of shorts for vacation. 

I know some people losing weight take all kinds of progress photos, and I can see why. It's motivating to see the loss. You see the scale number decreasing, and you feel yourself getting stronger, but it takes your brain a while to catch up. Seeing it in a photo helps.

What else...?

Lots of snuggles. With blankets. And books.

It is so freakin' cold outside. 

And even if I did want to throw them outside in the snow for a few minutes, Avery is currently minus one snow boot. I can't find that sucker anywhere.

(Maybe I should check in the magical drawer that Blankie always disappears into...)

I am currently reading a book that is nearly 20 years old.

It was an Oprah book club selection back in the day. 

This could be good or bad.

Oprah has done right by me (Pillars of the Earth), and she's also done me so, so wrong (Freedom).

In all honesty, I started this book almost 2 months ago. It didn't catch my attention right off the bat, and I just wasn't in the mood for it, and I read another book in the middle of it. I was about to quit altogether, but then I read some reviews on Goodreads and felt like thousands of people couldn't call it their favorite book ever and it be absolutely horrible. So I decided to keep reading. And when I think back, some of my favorite books were ones that built slow, establishing solid characters - ones that stick with me to this day. I'm about halfway through. And it's a good, solid book so far. 

So that is what is going on in my world. That and planning an Frozen-themed party for a certain girl who is turning five in a mere two weeks. Five! I can't even believe it!

Check back in later this month to see the huge, kick-ass Olaf balloon. 

post-Christmas catch-up

It's 2015 and we all survived the holiday season. There isn't much to survive in our world. We only attend two different Christmas get-togethers, which I find to be a real rarity after talking to other people. And especially since Jared has divorced parents. But I am not complaining. I find it way more enjoyable to go to a Christmas celebration and just stay, as opposed to running here and there, making sure to "make an appearance" so no one's feelings get hurt. Especially with kids in tow. Kids that probably missed naps and way overdid their allotted sugar intake.

We had a great Christmas.
As usual we attended Christmas Eve church service and hosted a meal of appetizers at our house for my family.
There were the usual pictures in front of the tree.

I felt like Christmas was relaxed this year. That is a goal of mine - to not become that frantic, crazed person rushing around buying gifts and thinking that perfection is what makes Christmas special. Santa didn't spoil our kids. Their grandparents and aunts do that. Our kids got one present each from Santa and the other two were from Mom and Dad. Santa of course gets to be the fun guy, while Mom and Dad gave books and clothes. 

Our families usually ask our opinion on presents to buy for the kids. Most of them know I hate the clutter of a thousand toys. Toys are important for kids, but we want stuff that makes them use their imaginations and be interactive. And they all did so great picking out stuff that they will use again and again, without driving Jared and me insane.

Princess dress-up stuff for the girls. Instant hit.

"The Little Blue Truck" board book. Graham is obsessed.

Little People. They've already been in the plane, bus, tractor, barn, you name it.

A unique, personalized board book made by my mom on Pint Size Productions. Graham loves this book. It is all about farm implements with pictures of his papa's tractors, combines, wagons, etc. And he can't get over that there is a picture of his grandparents in a book!

ThinkFun Roll & Play Game (G's present from Santa). All 3 kids love it. They learn and have fun at the same time. And it entertains for a long time. I highly recommend.

Tool set. Tractor repair was going down just yesterday morning.

This adorable Melissa & Doug doorbell house. Jared hid their snacks in it one day and Avery couldn't stop laughing at the fact that her fruit snack was hidden behind Door #2.

And of course they got clothes, and leggings for the obsessed Bailey, and other books. It was all stuff we can use and I appreciate all the thought that went into getting them meaningful gifts.

We went after-Christmas shopping on December 26th and scored some good deals on decorating stuff. Now that all my sisters have their own houses, we can all behave like old ladies excited over new decor items. :) 

New Christmas tradition for next year!
My sister Beaner told me of an ingenious idea that a friend does for Christmas each year. Every year she individually wraps every Christmas book they own and places them under the tree. Each night in the days leading to Christmas, the kids get to pick a book, unwrap it, and read it together that night. They are all books they have already read, but it's like they are brand new. It's a unique tradition that is essentially free and fun for the kids. Another way to get in the Christmas spirit. I am so going to do this next year!

Other stuff:

I don't know about you, but man we are getting lame on New Year's Eve. And when I say "getting" I really mean that we have been this way forever. We even had no kids for the evening (Thanks Mom!) and we were still lame. As my sister Justy expressed, it's all the pressure that comes with New Year's supposedly being this awesome, great time. I haven't ever had an amazing New Year's experience. Maybe one day? 

This year Jared and I went out for dinner and drank too many margaritas. We came home and drank some wine and played some games, passing time until it would be suitable to go to the bar. And then around 9:30 our couch started looking pretty amazing. And we did have a long list of movies DVRed. And with that showers were taken and jammies put on and we snuggled up on the couch to watch "Dallas Buyers Club." Yep, that is how behind we are on new releases. We were in bed before midnight. And it was pretty great.



I reached my goal and lost 30 pounds a few weeks ago. Christmas happened and I took the liberty of still working out but eating whatever indulgent crap I wanted. I gained a pound. Oh well. I would have been in a pissy mood passing up delicious food at Christmas for the sake of a calorie count. 

And despite the Christmas food free-for-all, I bought my first pair of jeans (not counting one pair of maternity jeans) in 8 years. 8 YEARS. That's pathetic. I have been getting by using some of Fe's jeans that she couldn't wear anymore (because sister lost like 60 pounds in the last 2 years!), but those are now too big. It was time. 
I am pretty ecstatic to report that I now fit into a pair of 9/10 jeans. That's amazing for me. I haven't been that size in probably a decade. 

On the exercise front, the week of Christmas I decided it was time to rededicate myself to actually getting more fit. For a while I had been coasting by, still losing weight, but not really challenging myself with workouts. So I started a new workout routine. It's called The 90 Day Warrior Workout by Hasfit.com, and it's a calendar with 3 months of workouts planned out for you. Some of the workouts are ones I have already done while doing the 30 Day Beginner calendar, but there are quite a few new routines that are kicking my butt at times. And that's a good thing. As always they are all exercises that are done at home with only handweights. I highly recommend if you are looking for something to challenge you without shelling out money for a gym membership you aren't sure you will use all that much.


I think that is about all for now. I put the kids in front of some Looney Tunes so I could have a minute (or 30. or 60.) to myself. Hey, at least it is the classics and not Caillou or some crap. Man, I hate that little, annoying brat... Him and his grating personality and that hat he always wears. One shouldn't have such aggression towards a PBS cartoon character, but it is what it is (to quote my mom).
I digress...
Time to go make lunch! 

Throwback Thursday

As most of you probably know, I started working out and tracking my calories back in April of this year. I don't write about it much because I don't want to bore people to tears, but it is definitely a big part of my life right now, so I thought a little update might be nice.

My weight loss has actually gone really well - despite my love for delicious and less-than-healthy foods at family get-togethers and holidays. I've lost 27 pounds at this point, surpassing my original goal of 20 a few months back. Starting around October I stopped being quite so rigid and am now satisfied losing a pound or (more typically) a half-pound a week. I work out about 5 days a week, sometimes for 30+ minutes and sometimes just for ten. I also have continued logging all my food on MyFitnessPal - something that I think has contributed greatly to my success thus far.

I was looking through photos over the past 12 months in order to make the calendars for family members, something I do every year at Christmas time. When you look at yourself in the mirror every single day, sometimes it is easy to not see progress. 
I couldn't resist a little side-by-side comparison, if only for my benefit.

I remember at the time thinking that that picture from 2013 was really flattering and made my face look thinner. Now I look at it and think, "Whoa, my face looked chubby!" 
And maybe it isn't a big difference at all to others looking at it, but it definitely is to me. 

Occasionally I wish I had taken a full body "before" photo like so many people do. At the time you definitely don't want photographic evidence of your starting point, but later on it would be nice to help you see just how far you have come. 

With the scale not moving as rapidly as it did in the beginning, I am happy to be noticing some non-scale victories lately.

• Exercise pants I bought back in July are now so loose in the waist that I can't really do an involved workout while wearing my insulin pump because it makes them start to fall off.

• I thought two pairs of workout/casual pants back in September. At the time I remember thinking, "Yeah they fit, but are they obnoxiously tight...? I will just wear them around the house." Now they are actually not fitted in the thighs anymore. That never happens!

• I tried on dress pants that I used to wear to church in college. I remember wearing them for the last time on an interview for a nursing internship. That was 2007. Now not only do they fit, they are actually maybe too baggy to even look dressy anymore. 

My goals are constantly changing. 

At first all I really wanted was to lose 15 pounds and get back to my pre-baby weight. At the time I thought, I would give anything to weigh that amount again.
But once I reached that weight I figured I'd try to get to the weight I was on my wedding day. I'm now 7 pounds past that goal. 
My current goal is to reach a healthy weight, which means I still have 8-13 pounds left to lose. Losing 13 more pounds would put me at a healthy BMI - something I haven't been since I was a senior in high school 12 years ago!

I have other non-scale related goals too.

I want to increase my physical strength and stamina for completing workouts.
I'd like to run a 5k next year sometime.
And I am thinking maaaybe even purchase (even wear?) a 2-piece bathing suit next summer...  (Jared is totally rolling his eyes and saying "Reeeeally?" to that one.)  But hey, ya gotta have something to work toward, right?   :)


So if anyone reading this is on a similar weight loss journey, feel free to comment and/or add me on MyFitnessPal. I can always use more inspiration and people to hold me accountable!

Down 20

This past weekend, after exactly 5 months of exercising (4 of them calorie counting with MyFitnessPal), I met my initial goal of losing 20 pounds. I had been chugging right along, but then it took me 6 weeks to lose the last 1.5 pounds - ridiculous!

Anyway, I've actually lost 21.2 pounds to be exact. 

But hey, who's counting, right? *wink wink*

It's been great to feel a difference in my clothing, but honestly, I swear I lost 15 pounds from my chin/face alone. Or maybe I am just learning the art of a skinnier looking selfie on Snapchat?
Every pair of pre-pregnancy jeans fits again - not so helpful since they were purchased about 6 or 7 years ago when fading was popular. 
Most of my shirts no longer fit or just look weird because, of course, my boobs defected first. Whatever, they weren't that great anyway...

Obviously my weight loss wasn't super fast. I wasn't dropping three pounds a week, but that wasn't my goal anyway. My goal was to lose weight and keep it off. 
Do I eat pizza? Yes.
Do I eat dessert? Yes.
Do I go out for margaritas and have more than I should? Yes.

I have been "dieting" this whole summer, through backyard cookouts, an anniversary trip, vacations, and s'mores freakin' galore. 

But here is the thing, I want to eat like a normal person. I am not going to pretend like I'm going to permanently refuse chocolate chip cookies or Reese's Peanut Butter pumpkins/trees/hearts/eggs for the rest of eternity. 
Cuz I'm not. 
So why try and lose weight like that?
The challenge for me was to find a balance: to eat healthier food and still eat the things I want within reason, plus keep exercise in the mix. 
And so far it's working. 

I started out thinking, "Yeah, yeah, sure I want to be healthier, but I would trade in healthy for skinny in a heartbeat."

Now my tune has changed. 

I {usually} like exercising. 
I like feeling accomplished when I am done. 
I like the feeling of muscles that are a bit sore the next morning.
And let's get real: I like being able to eat back some most of those calories I burned.

A big challenge for me that most people don't face is my Type 1 diabetes. 
Let me put it simply: it blows.
It takes a lot of fine-tuning to adjust insulin levels with the different forms/intensity of exercise. I can't tell you how many times I worked out, burning off 200, 300 calories and then had a low blood sugar an hour or two later. To bring up a low blood sugar you have to eat something, which just feels like a huge waste and totally counterproductive when you're trying to lose weight. Very frustrating.

And even after months of working to manage it, I still have lows. 
My basal levels (the amount of insulin your body needs throughout the day when not eating food) constantly change when my weight changes or because of less/more exercise. And anyone who is diabetic knows that when your blood sugar is low enough, you want to eat like you will never ever see food again.
Not the best thing for attempting weight loss.

So this post might seem to be a bit of tooting-my-own-horn, but it's my blog and I will do whatever I want I've been working hard and am excited to share my success.

21+ pounds doesn't really sound that amazing, but then I look at Graham. He weighs about 25 pounds now. I look at him and think, "Wow, I was basically carrying him around stapled to my butt?" (And chin. And waist.) 

That visual makes it feel like a real accomplishment.

Seven thoughts

{ONE}
Fe, Beaner, and I walked in our town's annual parade to support our youngest sister Justy's massage business. We handed out magnets and worked up quite a sweat. The girls got in on the action by donning their matching t-shirts and helping throw candy.

{TWO}
As I have mentioned before, I got serious about losing weight and getting into shape back in April. 
I am happy to report that I am currently down 17+ pounds in almost 4 months. 
It's no huge jaw-dropping number, but I am happy with it. I'm also happy that I am accomplishing it without totally giving up foods I love (milk, carbs, cake) or forking out money for memberships. It's just been simple exercising and not taking in more food than I burn every day. 
And it works. 
I have lost about a pound a week. And since my goal is to achieve a weight I can actually maintain, I am fine with a slow but steady decrease on the scale. 

{THREE}
I recently posted some photos of projects Jared had completed for his Etsy site. He is apparently on a real kick because he has been churning out all kind of new things lately. I think the newest one is pretty cute.

Source: Mason jar sconce/vase on painted wood

Source: Mason jar sconce/vase on stained wood

{FOUR}
This past week my parents were in Washington D.C. for a vacation and I was garden-sitting for them. We went out to pick green beans and cucumbers and sweet corn every two or three days. I was in bean snapping mode for hours and hours this week. Fresh garden produce is at the top of my list of favorite things about summer. Jared doesn't seem to truly appreciate the wonderfulness that is fresh green beans straight from the field - more for me!

{FIVE}
Some days it is just too hot to pretend I want to sit in the backyard watching the kids run around. Even if there is shade - don't care. Inside in the air conditioning is where it's at, folks. There is plenty of fun to be had reading books and playing in tents.

{SIX}
Speaking of books, I am back in reading mode. I have been wanting to read "The Fault in Our Stars" for months, especially since I knew the movie was coming out. Now if I want to go see it with my sister and her friend, I need to be finished in the next 10 days or so. So I should probably actually start it...

To any commenters: What is a great book you finished recently?
I love a good book recommendation, and my GoodReads "to read" list can always use a few new additions.

{SEVEN}
Check out my car wash cuties hard at work. The kids have fun and the car gets clean. Win-win situation.

And don't pretend like you weren't wearing your pink tutu the last time you washed your car.

And can we talk about Crocs for a moment? I don't love them. I have never owned a pair, don't plan on it. But Crocs (or a knock-off brand found basically anywhere) for kids? Amazing. 

They require zero assistance from me. And as many times in a day that the kids go out in the backyard and come inside again five minutes later, I figure I am saving myself at least a good half hour of work per day. 

Plus they are water proof. This is a big perk seeing as Avery abandons her shoes within one minute of going outside. I can't tell you how many pairs of soaked shoes I have rescued from the backyard after a rain storm. You throw in all the dirt they acquire at Papa's farm? Yep, Crocs, I have officially given in to your charms. 


Alright, I think that is enough random for now. 
Happy Monday!

being a bad blogger

Summer has {basically} arrived and blogging has slipped to the bottom of my list. 
I think of things I want to blog about, I formulate ideas and sentences in my head, but they don't really come to fruition. In the past my usual blogging time took place during nap time or at night after Jared left for work, which is after 10 PM. 

But lately other things have taken precedence. 
I started back on the whole weight loss journey. (Yes, again...) At the beginning of April I started to work out 5-6 days a week without fail. I found a great fitness site on YouTube that I love, so it's easy to work out in the comfort of my own living room just by hooking up our Ipad to the TV. At the end of April I added in calorie counting along with the workouts. I use MyFitnessPal (MFP). I downloaded the app on the phone and it is a breeze to use. It was a bit of a shock to see what actual portions are, but I know I needed to learn that. After being all over the map weight-wise for the last 5 years due to the pregnancies and constant pumping/breastfeeding, it was time to rediscover what my body needs and get back in shape.

It's been almost two months and I have happy to report I have lost 9 pounds. 
Yep, that sounds like not much.
And most days it feels like not much, too. 
But I feel stronger and am making better decisions when it comes to food. I am not super strict about my diet, but by using MFP, I can see what extra work it takes for that brownie or a night spent drinking a few beers with friends. I am not a person who is going to severely restrict calories - I love food! - so working out regularly and counting calories is what I'm going with. 

But by making working out a priority, other things take the back burner - like blogging. 
And the dishes. 
And the huge mess that is our living room by the time afternoon naps roll around. 
So now instead of blogging or doing the dishes during that hour or so of peace, I am jumping and pressing and lunging my butt off... hopefully in a literal sense. 
If any of you out there use MFP, feel free to add me as a friend. It's nice to have friends for support and encouragement and vise- versa.

Also distracting me from blogging is the call of the outdoors. There is weeding to do and the lawn has needed mowed about every 4 days or so lately. We have outside projects we are working on and kids are constantly outside doing something.
Plus it seems like every summer we want to cram in tons of fun stuff into three short months - hence the Summer Bucket List.

This past Friday was the Omaha Zoo.
We have gone every year since Bailey was born.

The Omaha aunts came along and made the day more fun.
Plus it's always nice to take shifts with those bulky, weighed-down strollers.